Being A Mom is Tough Blog Hop

For my regular readers, I am taking part in the Being a Mom is Tough Blog Hope.  We are reading Lysa TerKeurst's book Am I Messing Up My Kids? For my new guests, WELCOME!  I'd like to introduce you to those boys who call me Mom.

Colin, Carson, and Carter.  These are my boys, and I am their Mama.  It seems that when I go into daycare or a store or to the park, I hear, "There's Carter's Mom, " or "Hey, Colin's Mama."  Sometimes, when I leave a message on my cousin's voice mail, I don't say my name, but I say, "Hello, this is Colin, Carson, and Carter's Mom. Give me a call  back when you get a chance." Regardless of where we are, I am usually defined by being their mom.  

I do have a name.  My name is Natasha.  And this is me with ALL of by boys.  My husband Jeff is the lucky man who God chose to be the daddy of these boys and the husband of this mama/wife. 

My boys are simply amazing.  What mama wouldn't say that?  

Colin is my firstborn. You know, the one that you made sure everyone washed their hands with before they held him.  The one that you had no idea what you were doing with and wondered if you were even smart enough to mix the formula with water to feed him.  Colin and I spent many, MANY sleepless nights together.  The kid seriously quit sleeping when he came home from the hospital.  He napped while I fed him.  People would always ask, "Do you get to sleep when he sleeps?"  I just laughed (really wanted to cry), "Shoot no!  The kid never sleeps!"  He's the kid that "slept" in the middle of our king size bed for his first 3 years, just so I could sleep. We would put a movie in the VCR, push play, and go to sleep.  Then at whatever time the movie went off, Colin would wake us up to rewind it and start again.  See, the kid never slept.  Don't forget the colic. Oh, colic how I hate thee! Now that he is almost 12, and it's summer, he is sleeping in....a little just because he stays up half the night.  Colin is a very tenderhearted young man.  He has accepted the Lord as his Savior and is very involved in church, serving as an usher and the drummer for the youth praise band.  He plays baseball and soccer. Colin has been on the Academic Team for 3 years, he was on the robotics team for 2 years, and has just returned from his third trip to Space Camp. This summer he earned his first real paycheck for running the sound equipment for a wedding at our church. Now, if I could just get him to clean his room. I know things get tough for him because he is the oldest.  He is paving the way for his brothers.  They get in is space when all he wants is to be away from them.

Carson is my middle child.  Although he is eight years old, he is still very much my baby.  After Carson was born, he was rushed to NICU due to fluid in his lungs.  It was very scary for us, and he still has problems to this day.  He has to have breathing treatments when the weather changes or he will get sick. Living in south central Kentucky where we can experience all four seasons in one week can pose major health risks for him.  We have to be very cautious even with  a runny nose or slight cough.  It's hard for family to understand that we don't visit much due to the cigarette smoke. He has asthma and is allergic to nuts and peanut butter. So, I carry around an EpiPen and inhaler everywhere we go.  Carson is very matter of fact.  Repetition is pointless if he already knows something (Seriously, the two weeks his kindergarten teacher made him trace his name was torture....on both of us.).  In first grade, he was placed into a small reading intervention group because he was having trouble with nonsense words.  I just had to laugh.  Nonsense words??? Are you kidding?  If they don't really exist and he is already reading on a 3rd grade level, Carson doesn't care about nonsense words! Carson loves science.  He loves to read. He learns things, and I'm like, "What?  Where did you learn that?"  He's taught me stuff that I actually had to look up because I just couldn't believe he would know something like that.  Carson is a very neat kid.  He has the advantage of being able to do things with Colin and be a "big kid" or do things with his little brother.  When my youngest child was born, I had to take Carson out of daycare.  He would get up with me during the middle of the night to help me with diapers and bottles. He became my shadow and developed a bond with his baby brother.  I am curious to see what Carson will do as he gets older.  He is such a homebody like his mama, but he loves to learn.  He can be quite a character too! He has the most awesome Charlie Brown dance you have ever seen!

  

My youngest son is Carter.  The baby.  Yes, he is four years old, and I still call him The Baby. He asked me the other day if he was a toddler. I informed him he was actually a Preschooler, still though, my baby.  Carter arrived a little early after we found out I had been losing amniotic fluid.  The boy hasn't stopped going since the day he was born.  He is VERY active, VERY rowdy, and VERY funny. You never know what is going to come out of his mouth. The boy loves to play...play outside, play toys, play iPad, play soccer, play baseball, play, play, play.  If you want an adventure, take him to play some miniature golf.  Oh, my!  The first time we took him, we were all sweaty and tired. He and Carson both loved every minute of it and were like wild animals let out of a cage.  During that vacation, I think we played at Goofy Golf every single night!  Carter doesn't realize how little he is.  Being the youngest, he has always been around older kids.  He thinks when Colin's friends come over that they are there to play with him.  He is our social creature.  But you have to be careful around him.  He likes to hit, and he hits hard, in places he shouldn't. We are working on that.  We were embarrassed when he brought his barber to his knees at the ball park one night.  I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. He comes ups with something new to say or do all the time. Right now, he is stuck on "Mama, smell my pain."  After saying that, he then shoves something in my face to smell: an armpit, foot, or his butt.  Good times!  But he is definitely my cuddle bug.  We have our routines. We have our "Mommy and Carter Time" because well, it is special to him and he has to have it.  He is definitely a mama's boys.

I absolutely LOVE being a mom.  It is definitely tough.  My kids are no angels and I am no saint. So, yes, things get a little hairy.  They disobey. I fuss. They keep on. I fuss a little louder.  They keep on. I yell.  They tell me I am mean and don't like it when I yell, and I tell them, they are disrespectful and I don't like it when they don't obey me. If they would just do what I said the first time I said it, our lives would be so much simpler!  There are times we are laughing, calm, having a good time, and all of sudden, they are ready to get each other.  I am prying kids off of kids, and swatting butts, and yelling, and they are yelling, and slapping at each other.  It's in those moments I'm like, "Wait! What just happened?"  We all totally lost it in a matter of seconds.  

Sometimes it is so hard to remember that my kids aren't these perfect creatures, that they will disobey and fuss and fight and not make good choices.  That is difficult when I know they know better.  Sixth grade about killed me this year. As a teacher, I take pride in the fact that my kids know (well, should know) what parents and teachers expect, and I had the allusion they would always do the right thing.  But when Colin chose not to do his work for reading the last quarter, I about died.  What? One of the smartest kids in his class?? An F in reading??? He chose not to do the work???? Oh, this mamateacher wasn't going to have it.  It about killed us both, but he brought the F up to a B.  Whew! That was close. 

There are times I wonder where these kids get their stubbornness, their fits of rage, their attitude. Then I look in the mirror and realize that I am the problem.  And honestly, I ask myself on a daily basis, "Am I messing up my kids?"  As a mom, that is a major fear of mine.  Am I going to be too strict? Will I not be strict enough when I need to be?  Will I say something that will ruin their perceptions of themselves? Will they doubt my love for them? Am I able to raise them to be the men God intends for them to be?

God has entrusted me with these children. He chose me to be their mom.  God's ways are perfect, and He doesn't mess up. Why then do I doubt that I can be the mother these kids need me to be?  I know that Satan is fighting for my children just like I am.  I don't want him to get his hands on them, but I worry that my actions will allow him to.  I know I need to lean on God to be the mom I am supposed to be.  I know that if I truly seek Him, God will restore my, refresh my perspective, and guide me.

I am thankful for God's mercy. I need His forgiveness daily.  I need to not define myself by my mistakes, but take heart in the good moments, those moments that really build my children up.  I have to stop expecting everything to be great and calm and easy all the time.  That's not realistic.  There are going to be days of sibling rivalry, disobedience, and flat out defiance.  There are going to be days they don't clean up their toys, put their dirty dishes away, or clean the pee off the toilet seat.  There are going to be days where we feel like we are going to pull our hair out if we have to spend one more moment together.  But there are also going to be the days we laugh together, swim together, play together. There will be the days we give hugs, kisses, and high fives.  There will be the days we pray together, sing together, and encourage one another.  Those are the days I need to draw my strength from.   I need to dwell on those days, not the tough days.  Those tough days are for learning, for forgiving, for moving on.

No matter what day I am having, I am thankful. Thankful that God gave me an amazing husband and allowed us to be the parents of these precious children.

Book Giveaway!

Recently, I had the opportunity to review the book Miracles and Moments of Grace: Inspiring Stories from Moms.  You can read my review by clicking HERE.  I love Nancy Kennedy's book.  The stories melt my heart.

Well, I have gotten my hands on an extra copy of this heartwarming book. If you would like to have it, it could be yours.  If you know someone who would enjoy the book, it could be hers.

To have a chance to win this amazing book, all you have to do is leave a comment below telling your own motherhood story. Your story can be about you, your mom, or someone who has been like a mom to you. It can make us laugh or it can make us cry.  As mom's each of our stories are unique. You can read about some of my motherhood moments by clicking HERE and HERE.

This giveaway will end on Friday, May 23.

Good luck!

By the way,  this giveaway is in no way endorsed by the author or publisher of this book. I simply have an extra copy and want to give it away. You know....share the love.

Surprised by Motherhood

I just finished Lisa-Jo Baker's book Surprised by Motherhood.  I was really excited about the release of this book, so excited that I preordered and received it in the mail before it was officially released.

Well, let me just say that I was not disappointed. I don't want to give away anything, but let me just say.....

My heart was touched.

Why is it that moms always feel they are lone? We feel that we are messing things up. We are terrible because we lose our temper or hide out in the bathroom just for five seconds of alone time.

But we aren't alone.

As moms, we are all different, but we are all the same.

Like Lisa-Jo, you may have not  first desired to be a mother.  Me on the other hand....I had it planned out.  Get married. Have 3 kids.....two boys and a girl.

But like every other plan, God had a different, better plan.

I have my 3 children, just not that girl.  Being the mom of three boys....I wouldn't trade it for anything. When I got pregnant back last summer, the main question was, "Are you hoping for a girl?"   My answer was always no.  If I were to become pregnant again, just so you know, my answer is still no.  Like Lisa-Jo, I wouldn't know what to do with a girl.  I think I am doing pretty good with these boys right now.  Honestly, I would love to have a daughter, however, I would not get pregnant just to have a daughter.  But even more than that, I would just want a healthy baby.  That's true more than ever since experiencing a miscarriage.

Motherhood.

It is so much more than I expected.  I always thought I would love being a mother.  But the love I have for my children is so much more than what I could have imagined.

I think being a mom and being in love with your children gives us a glimpse of how much God is in love with us.  I have held my sleeping sons and cried because God whispered to me, "You see this?  You know how much you love this baby?  Well, I love you more."  HE loves me more.

We all get so burnt out on the routines of life.  Wake up. Get kids up. Get them to school. Work. Get kids after school. Take part in after school activities. Cook. Clean. Bathe. Do homework. Go to bed. Get up. Go to bed again.  Wake up. Do it all over again.

The laundry piles up.

The dishes get dirty and pile up.

The toys make for an obstacle course.

There are tears.

There is yelling.

There are more tears.

There are kids fighting.

There is poop, puke, and pee to clean up.

Well, being a mom....you can never get bored.  There is always something to do.  A kid to hold, a toy to put away, a nose to wipe, a glass of milk to pour, a butt to wipe.  But being a mom is so much more.

It's letting the kids giggle in bed instead of shushing them to sleep because the sound is breathtaking.

It's scooting over in bed because some little person had a bad dream and cuddling with mom and sticking a foot in dad's back is safe and secure.

It's the honest truth that those pants really do make your butt look big and your toddler is the only one to tell you what you've always suspected.

It's the lines and dates on the door facing that show the growth of your wee ones as they soon become as big as you.

It's cheering them on during a game.

It's giving a much needed hug when they fail.

It's hearing, "Mama, I love you," the most precious words in the world.

It's getting sticky kisses.

It's your toddler belting out Clark Griswold's " I LOVE A PARADE!" has he hops into bed at night and then begins singing The B-I-B-L-E.

It's the funny little sayings.....Mama, smell my feet.  Mama, your breath stinks. Mama, I tooted. Eeew! Mama, you tooted.  Mama, I am NOT going to school today. Mama, your butt looks big.  No, Daddy. I want Mama.

Mama.

Being a mama is so breathtaking, awesome, inspiring, tiring, frustrating, scary, wonderful gift.

Like Lisa-Jo, I am raising Kingdom Kids.  My children are a gift from God.  I have stood with each of them in front of the church and dedicated them back to the Lord.  All too often, I realize that they are only mine for a little while.  I must do everything I can to guide them to Jesus, to help them to become the God-fearing men that are warriors for Christ.

I wanted to be a mama more than anything else in the world, and on July, 26, 2002, I was given that gift. Colin is almost 12.  His first twelve years have flown by, and I know that in the blink of an eye, Colin will be driving, then off to college, and then creating a life of his own.  It seems like only yesterday I lied to the nurses on the phone and told them my contractions were consistently 5 minutes apart.  They were anywhere from 5-8 minutes apart, but when you can't even stand up.....well, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.  This first boy of mine gave me one heck of a delivery.  After 12 hours of labor, no epidural, and 3 hours of pushing, my almost 10 pound baby stole my heart.  I feared for him when he rolled off the couch as an infant.  When he began walking, Colin was as clumsy as his mama. We spent many nights rushing to the ER because his fever would spike.  He is so tenderhearted, this boy who opened his heart to Jesus during revival.  He helps kids up on the soccer field if they fall even though they are on the opposing team.  God has provided him with some amazing opportunities.  Space Camp, Academic Team, Robotics Team, STLP.  He loves church.  He loves God.  He loves others.  He is a little old man in a kid's body.  Sometimes I forget that he is a kid.  I probably lose my temper with him the most.  Maybe I expect more from him.  He is so grown up most of the time, that when he does some crazy kid thing, I totally can't believe he did it.  I forget to let him be

little. He teaches me about myself.  I see his insecurities and they are the same as mine.  He gets his temper from me. But he loves....Man that kid loves. He's built like his daddy, stocky, thick.  He procrastinates like his daddy too, but we won't talk about that!  As my first born, he continues to teach me so much. Right now, I often wonder if I am going to survive his puberty!  I realize that at this age, Colin doesn't understand his body, his emotions, the changes he is going through.  He's not a little kid any more, but he isn't a teenager either.  He's at that awkward stage where he is trying to find where he fits in.  Honestly, he fits perfectly in my heart.

In 2006, we opened our arms to Carson. My Iley.  He had a rocky start on this stormy spring birth day, having to be rushed to NICU after birth.  His poor lungs were filled with fluid, and he had so much trouble breathing.  At 8 years old, he hasn't fully recovered from that.  This kid, my Iley C., he struggles so much with his health.  When he gets sick, he is sick. He's missed out on fieldtrips, parties, and family holiday celebrations. Tonight, he is missing out on his baseball game. Severe leg cramps prompted us to have tests run.  Food allergies keep an EpiPen nearby, along with a bottle of Benedryl. He is my milk loving boy. My hotdog bun eater. My child with a very sweet tooth!  He wants what he likes and expects us to know what it is without asking.  Stubborn. Stubborn as a mule that boy of mine.  Named after my grandfather, he is so much like him.  The eyes, the ears, the way he crosses his legs, the little things he does that shows he loves you.  His love for banana popsicles takes me back to my childhood summers on Cherry Street. Pa Tootsie always had our favorite banana popsicles on hand. This second boy child of mine became my shadow at the age of three when he became a big brother.  If I was up at 2 a.m. feeding the baby, he was up with me.  Every time I turned around, he was there.  He was so much on my schedule that we pulled him out of daycare, thus creating this bond with his baby brother.  Still, I always expect him in my bed sometime during the night.

Carson is this artistic creature.  I think he gets that from Jeff's grandmother.  Nanny loved to draw and so does Carson.  He's going to be our scientist. A strong, silent man.  There's no need in talking about things we all know....if he doesn't want to talk, he doesn't.  He's not being rude, he just doesn't see how nonsense is necessary.  My soul prays each day for his salvation.  I know he thinks about God. I know he loves God.  I just want to make sure that he understands what Christ has done for him and be able to recognize God's still small voice. My Iley Carson.

After a family trip to Chicago in 2009, we found out that our third little one would be joining our family.  This child, a wild man, came into the world after we found out I had been losing amniotic fluid. Since his arrival, he has let the world know that he is here! Carter is non stop. He is Mister Personality.  He is my baby in every way.  He's four years old, and I still call him the baby.  The third baby. Carter doesn't know how little he really is.  He has never know little. He's know his big brothers, and anything they can do, Carter can do....and better.  Colin's friends are Carter's friends.  He knows no different.  Carter likes things just so.  Sippy cup empty? Throw it across the room.  Need something? Yell for it.  Mad at your brothers? Hit them.  He's not always wild.  Not always.  He loves to cuddle at bed time.  And only Mama will do.  When I had my miscarriage, it hurt Carter and me both that I couldn't get out of bed to care for him. Jeff would let him cuddle with me and then make him go to the other room so I could rest. One night, Jeff was trying to get Carter in bed, and I hear him on the baby monitor telling him that he doesn't like him and he wants Mama to put him to bed.  He's definitely Mama's Boy.  We have our routines, and he likes them. He needs them.  We have to sing Rock-a-bye Baby right after I dry him off after his bath. At bedtime, we have to watch Caillou.

And my "choceemilk" kid knows at bed time, it's only white milk! This boy, my Carter, he is my hero in so many ways.  I pray that in his daring endeavors, his escapades, that he will be a lover of Jesus.  He is loving church. My heart melts when he sings his favorite songs of Jesus.I can't wait to see what this boy of mine will do.

These boys of mine. My gifts from heaven.  They have changed me and taught me. They've taught be about myself, about the world, about life, about love. Being their mama has brought many surprises.  Many things I didn't know about myself.   I have loved deeper than I have imagined.  I have learned to negotiate. I have sacrificed.  I have laughed.....and cried. I continue to face my fears. I become stronger each day. 

This whole motherhood thing is more than I ever thought it would be.  It is better.  It is worth it.

Five Minute Friday: Paint

Our lives paint a picture, a picture filled with memories.  As I sat reading Surprised by Motherhood last night, Lisa-Jo used her words to paint a picture in my mind.  I saw what she saw. I felt what she felt (hence the wiping away of tears) and then reflected on myself. Myself as a mom, what has brought me to motherhood, and, I guess in simple terms,  a look to the future - how will this motherhood role affect my children.

I want this life of mine to paint beautiful memories for them.  I want, and pray to be each day, to be the mother they need me to be.  That I can mold them and guide them to be the Christian men God has planned for them.

I want the painted memories to be those of love, compassion, encouragement, and fun.  I want them to know when I am wrong, when I mess up, that I honestly, truly try to do the right thing.  Because this whole motherhood thing will paint a path for these boys.  They will have an image of what a mother is or is not.  It will affect them as they become men of age and start dating and then one day marry.  I want what I am to impact their decisions on the women they date and then woman that is chosen to become the wife.  

STOP

If you stopped by here today, Thank You!  You've just read my Five Minute Friday post (Yes, I do realize this is Saturday, but a mama's got to write when a mama can write).  Five Minute Friday is simple.  Each day, visit Lisa-Jo to find out the word of the the week.  Then write for five minutes.  Don't worry. Don't over analyze (don't analyze at all really). Just write.

Book Review: Miracles and Moments of Grace: Inspiring Stories from Moms

Miracles and Moments of Grace: Inspiring Stories from Moms is the third book in Nancy B. Kennedy's Miracles and Moments of Grace Series, all of which I have had the pleasure to read. 

This book is compiled of stories that will move a mother's heart.  Each story is unique as is each of our mothering experiences.  Some stories are told from a mother's relationship or experience with her own child, while others are told from a woman's relationship with her own mother.  Either way, each story is heartwarming.  Women share their experiences on seeking God's guidance while parenting. Still, other women share funny stories that many moms can relate too. 

In one particular story, a mother is reminded of the love and compassion her mother had shown her as she was growing up.  At the time the story was written, the woman was taking care of her mother and become frustrated with something her mom had done.  She extended grace to her mother and remembered that she had once done the same for her.

This is a wonderful book for mothers.  The stories remind us of the importance of motherhood, the special bond between women and their children, and the grace that we should extend to others because of the grace God has extended to us. 

I received a free copy of this book from Leafwood Publishers for the purpose of review.  The review is my own opinion of the book. 

The High Calling of Motherhood

Set an example of good works yourself, with integrity and dignity in your teaching. Titus 2:7

These past few days I have been reminded about what an awesome responsibility and blessing it is to be a mom.

I think of my children as MINE. However, I have been reminded that my children are HIS.

You see, God chose me to be the earthly guardian of these precious children. It is my responsibility to take care of them and raise them to be Christian men. Ultimately, we are all God's children. When He makes us parents, God is choosing those he wants to care for His children until they are returned to Him.

I stop to think about what an awesome responsibility that is. God CHOSE me and Jeffrey to be the parents of Colin, Carson, and Carter. He knew that we are what those children need. Now, we are to care for them and raise them for Him. We are to help them become the God fearing men that He has planned.

Yesterday during Sunday School, we were asked to say something good about our moms.  Then we were asked, "What do you want your children to say about you when they are adults?"

Wow! What a question!

I hope that my children can say that they never had a doubt that I loved them. Everything I did for them was out of love. I want them to say that I did the best I could to raise them in a Christian home, that I taught them about Jesus and helped them to know and love Him. I want them to say I put them above my own selfishness, that I thought of them and their daddy before I thought of myself. I want them to say that I provided for them the best I could, that I knew how to have fun with them. I want them to say I was forgiving and compassionate. I want them to say they saw Jesus in me. I want them to be thankful that God chose me to be their mom. I want them to rise up and call me blessed!

Yesterday at church, Bro. Copass talked about motherhood as a divine calling. We must remember that Christian mothers can NOT do it alone. We need the help of our Christian husbands, church, and most importantly, our Heavenly Father. We must be willing to admit that we are not perfect. We must be willing to ask for help. We must be willing to be a Christian example to our children.

As we sang the hymn of invitation, I got to thinking about the day I received Jesus as my Savior. That was the best decision I have ever made, not only for me, but also for my children. You see, I had gone to see Bro. Copass about dedicating Colin to the Lord before our church. As we talked, he asked me the most important question, a question that had never been asked to me before. He asked, "Have you received Jesus as your personal Savior?" I just knew he thought I was crazy. My answer was no, but here I was wanting to dedicate my precious child to the Lord. But you know what? Bro. Copass didn't think any less of me. He helped me to see that it was just as important for me to be a Christian mother and wife as it was to want to dedicate my son. So that day, Friday, June 18. 2004, I made a decision that affected my entire family. I admitted that I couldn't do it alone, that I knew who Jesus was and believed in Him and his resurrection with all my heart, and that I needed Him to save me and change my life. He promised me He would, and He hasn't let me down.

That following Sunday as we dedicated Colin to our Lord, I made a public profession of my faith in Jesus. Following me down the aisle was my husband. Wow! A month later, we were baptized in front of our friends, family, and Heavenly Father. Since then, God has worked wonders in our lives. We are totally dedicated to serving God. We teach Sunday School, serve as nursery workers, Jeffrey serves as a deacon, and is working toward becoming an Army Chaplain. I teach VBS each summer and have had the amazing opportunity to lead children to Christ, and have invited women into my home for Bible study. My mother and father in law were baptized and joined the church. Colin opened his heart to Jesus and was baptized. God isn't finished with us. I am not boasting about me and my husband. This is not our work, but rather the work of our Lord. This is all HIM.

We each have been blessed with gifts. I have been blessed with the gift of motherhood. With that gift comes responsibility. God used my oldest son to reach me, a lost mother who wanted to raise her child in a Christian home. I owe it to Him to train up these children in the way they should go, so that when they are old, they will not depart from it.


During the invitation yesterday, a young mother came forward and surrendered her life to Jesus.  I was so happy for her as I knew she was making the best decision of her life, not only for her, but also for her family. What an amazing Mother's Day gift she was able to give!