Even If Not

Back in August, I was fortunate enough to attend the first ever (and perhaps only) Five Minute Friday Retreat.  I met close to 20 amazing strangers who will forever have a place in my heart.  One of my roommates that weekend was Kaitlyn Bouchillon.  And ya'll, Kaitlyn published her first book this year.  

I have just finished reading this precious book, Even If Not.  And I feel led to share one of my even if not moments with you.

I'm a planner. It's not my job, but I love to plan.....parties, events, life.....putting details together to make something wonderful.  I had a plan for my life: marriage, teaching job, 3 kids (2 boys and a girl).  I had always believed that my plans would fall in line when God's timing was right and I would accept his timing.  That's what I said, and I also said I trusted Him.

After being married for a few years, my husband and I decided we wanted to start our family of 2 boys and a girl.  A friend of ours was trying to conceive as well and she was pretty upset that things weren't going as planned. She struggled to get pregnant.  I told her that the stress didn't help her and that God would make it happen when the time was right.  Words from a nonChristian to a Believer.

She soon became pregnant, and I thought, "See? I told you so!"

Then it was my turn.

After missing a period and taking about a million home pregnancy tests that were inconclusive, I made an appointment with my doctor to find out for sure.  I had convinced myself that if I wasn't pregnant, it would be ok and that it would happen at the right time.  I said I trusted God's plan.

I didn't.

I went to the doctor, took yet another pregnancy test, and was told, "No, honey, you are not pregnant."

My face grew hot and I felt outrage. What???? How could this be? I wanted to be pregnant!  I knew I had to be pregnant. They were wrong. God, why are you doing this to me??? I'm ready to be a mom.

I had always said I trusted God's plan and timing. This was the time to prove it and I failed miserably.  I raced out of that doctor's office, grabbed my husband, and took off for the car.  I was heartbroken. Angry.  Full of unbelief.

I had said that I trusted God even if I wasn't pregnant, and it was a lie.

At that point I realized the disbelief, and it hurt just as bad as not being pregnant.

Truth be told, I was pregnant. God didn't let me know until my first trimester was almost over.  Why? I don't know, but I think it was to help my with my disbelief.  Although I was not yet a Christian, those months were a growing time for me. Those months would shape my thoughts and beliefs for things I would experience later on.

When my second born would be rushed to NICU after birth, I had to believe.

When my third child was induced due to the loss of amniotic fluid, I had to believe.

When my husband was deployed to war, I had believe.

When my fourth pregnancy ended in miscarriage, I had to believe.

Each day, I have to believe, that even if God doesn't follow my plan, that He is still good.

And He is good, very good.

And I believe.

Kaitlyn, thank you for sharing your words and reminding us that we all have a story to tell....no....a story we must tell.  God works in all moments, the good, the bad, the beautiful, and the messy.  When we are broken, He is there. When we are whole, He is there.  Even if life is not what we thought it would be, God is there. We tell these stories to share the love of Christ.  We weren't meant to keep them to ourselves. Share we must. Blog it.  Write it.  Tell it across the dinner table. Whisper it in the darkness. But share it.

Friends, get you a copy of Even If Not. Read it. Share it.  Tell your even if not story.

Bringing Out the Mama Cheetah

I decided today that it’s a good thing I’m not a mama cheetah.

We were watching a video today in class, and the narrator told how cheetah cubs learn through play. The cubs were seen pouncing and rolling and nipping at one another.

This mama wanted to say, “Boys! Stop that!” I was really nervous for those cheetah cubs, afraid they would play a little too rough and one might get hurt.

Yes, I’m serious. Don’t laugh.

I pictured my boys playing and learning, and being, well, boys.

And yes, they make me nervous.

I know they are going to play rough. They are going to wrestle and punch and kick. And they will get hurt.

As their mama, I want to protect them.  I want to have padded walls and floors and full body armor and helmets.  I don’t want them to get hurt.  But all that might seem a bit psychotic, so I won’t go there.

Seriously though….

I’m the mom of three boys.  I do want to protect them.  I want to keep them from making mistakes.  I want to keep their paths straight and painless.

But I know I can’t, and I know even if I could, then it still wouldn’t be right.

It’s difficult to admit this, but our kids need to get hurt. They need to experience disappointment and loss and heartache.  As much as I want their lives to be perfect and carefree, I know deep in my heart that my children would never learn from that. The world is an imperfect place because it is full of imperfect people.

Doesn’t our learning and growth and wisdom come from trials? 

If we never experience despair of some sort, we will never really know how wonderful life is.

I look at my 13-year-old.  I think about what lies ahead for him.  There is so much I want to protect him from, so many experiences I don’t want him to have, but if I shelter him and protect him too much, how will he ever learn?

I think we can shelter our children too much, and I think we can be too lax.  They are children.  We shouldn’t allow them to be adults too soon.  One of these days, my boys will be out on their own. They will have their own lives (and it won’t be in my basement when they are 40 years old).

 Part of living is knowing how to deal with trials and hurts and loss.  Part of my job as their mother is to teach them how to handle those experiences.  I need to teach them perseverance, compassion, forgiveness.  They need to see me demonstrate those qualities in my life. They need to see how their father and I handle stress, anger, and disappointment.  They need to witness us showing love and kindness to our enemies.  I need to teach them about Christ and His love for them.  They need to see Christ in my life.

I can’t protect my children from everything, but I can teach them how to respond to their imperfect world. And when I do that, and God willing they live Christian lives, they will make this world a better place.

So, maybe I need to be a little more like a mama cheetah, letting my boys explore a little more, but yet, grasping their napes when danger is involved.  I can do that, can’t I?  

Five Minute Friday: Quiet

Guys, be quiet!

Will you be quiet for a minute?

If ya'll would be quiet, you could hear what I was saying.


Do you know how many times this teacher mama asks little ones to be quiet each day? Well, me neither, but I know it's a lot.

Sometimes all we gals need is a little peace and quiet. Time to relax. Time to speak.  Just no noise, silence, to do or say what needs to be done or said.

It feels like noise is never-ending.

As a mama, I try to get my boys to stop yelling.  I try to get them quiet while I'm on the phone - well, because you know our kids don't want to talk to us until someone calls us.

Quiet please! For just 5 minutes.


But one of these days, that quiet will come for every mama.

For whatever reason.....

The heartbreaking loss of a child or the inevitable growing up of a child.

The house will be come quiet.

Too quiet.

Too soon.



We will ache.

We will ache for those arguments.

We will ache for that laughter, those unstoppable giggles.

We will ache for that call in the middle of the night, "Mama, come lay down with me."



When my middle son was just a wee bit younger, he had this VERY high pitched voice.  It was loud and squeaky, and well, loud.

I remember telling him many times, "SHHHHH! Be a little quieter."

Then we got the book Holler Loudly.

My five minutes is up, but let me finish.

We got the book Holler Loudly through Dolly Parton's Imagination Library.  We read the book and this mama cried.

You see. Holler was born loud.  That's just who he was.  His parents, his teachers, and everyone in town was annoyed by his loudness and just wanted him to be quiet. It broke his spirit, but one day, Holler saved his town by being heard.

And it was in that moment that I realized that this loud, squeaky, high pitched voice was who Carson was and that one day too soon, that voice will be gone.  And it is changing.  He's a few years older, but that voice isn't the same.

And this mama misses it.

I miss how Colin used to say geen instead of green and sampoo instead of shampoo and Meeus Leaaazzzleeee.

I miss how Carson used to say aaaand as loudly and high pitched as he could get and how everything else included "well, actually."

And Carter, our youngest,  I already miss "I wuv you, Mama" and "Wook what I can do" and "Tootie too."

And just last night during our devotion about peace and trust and worry, he said this, "Mama, I have worries."

What??? He's five! What does he have to worry about?????

And he's worried about speech. That when he goes to see Mrs. Nisha to work on his sounds that he will mess up.

Oh, baby its ok.  Your speech is one of the things that makes you special and one day those sounds and your incorrect usage of her and she will be gone and Mama is going to miss it.

The laughter from, "Who farted?"

Their noise

The anger of "You're a liar! You said you would play with me."

Their voices

The singing of God's Not Dead, Kick the Dust Up, and Whose Gonna Fill Their Shoes from the backseat

The bedtime prayers that start like dinnertime blessings

I love you, Mama fifty gazillion times a day


I'm gonna miss it because one day it will be too quiet too soon.

Thank you for hanging in there with me on this week's FMF post.  The timer went off, but I couldn't stop.  Don't forget to head over to Kate's place to read some other thoughts on the prompt Quiet.

Five Minute Friday on Monday: Present

It's time for us to be present.  To really be awake and alert.

Things happen that cause me to shudder, cause me to consider the brevity of life.

We are not promised tomorrow.  A crisis can change all we know and love.



We've been blessed with a foot of snow.  Yes, a blessing.

I've stopped.

I've cuddled with my boys and their daddy.  We played in the snow, built Harold the Snowman, made snow angels, threw snowballs, went sledding.  We were there together in those cold snowy moments making memories.

When we are present, truly there, we do that.

We enjoy life, soak it in, cherish it.

We need more moments like that because in this busy world of going here and there, we get in ruts and routines, and we forget.

We forget that we are not promised tomorrow, but we only have the promise of the present moment.

So make it count.

Our children are depending on us.  They are looking to us for guidance, for love, for fun, for life.  We owe it to them.  We owe them our time.

So it is time to do Five Minute Friday on Monday.

It is time to stay up late and watch movies.

It is time to go slow.

It is time to put on layers of clothes to brave the elements (and seriously not be able to put our arms down).

It is time to bake a cake and make snow cream.

It is time to say YES.

It is time to be fully present and put family first.

I hope that whatever weather you are having, that you've found time to be present in the moment.  Thank you for joining me on this beautiful day.  Don't forget to head over to Kate's to read other great posts about Friday's Prompt: Present. 

When the Christmas Decorations are Put Away

Yesterday, I took down and put away all of my Christmas decorations.

To tell you the truth.....

I didn't want to.

Seriously, I love the soft glow of the lights.  I love how the stockings hang from the mantle.  I love the Christmas cards taped to the doorway.    I love the sound of the jingle bells on the front door.

But it had to be done.

As we put away or decorations, we do one other thing (and I credit this to a blog post I found online a couple of years ago).   We write notes to God.  Each member of our family takes a note card and writes a wish, a promise, a goal, something to God.

Maybe we want to read the Bible more.  Maybe we want to be more available to Him.  Something different for each of us.

We write these out privately. Seal them in an envelope. Place them in our stockings. Pack them away.

The next year as we retrieve our Christmas stockings, we open our notes and share them aloud.

It's amazing to see that we've kept our promises or grew beyond what we wanted.  It's almost like giving a Christmas present to God, but He blesses us more.

These notes help give us a purpose for the year.  We don't want to look back upon reading the letters and realize that we let God down.  We want to live each day intentionally for Him.

One Word 2016

On the eve of this upcoming year, I am ready.  Ready to commit to my One Word that will shape my life, not only for the next 365 days, but for the rest of my lifetime.

We all have different ways of selecting that one word.  Sometimes we choose it randomly.  Sometimes God chooses it for us. Sometimes it is easy to select. Sometimes it comes with a bitter taste.

I was all prepared to announce my One Word days ago.  But then......

I went to the mail and found my Faithbox.  What a nice surprise it was!  I really wasn't expecting it until the first of the year, but was delighted to open it.

Greeting cards. Tea. Devotional. Planner. Bracelet.

And that question......

What's your purpose?

Isn't that the question we all want the answer to???

What is my purpose?

Author

Stay at home mom

Soldier

Factory Worker

Pastor

Teacher

Musician

Lawyer

And the list continues.

Throughout our lives, we make decisions based on what we feel our purpose should be.  We plan our futures based off this idea and it determines which college we go to, which company we work for, the person we marry, the number of children we have, the neighborhood we live in.  Many times we choose our purpose without considering God's purpose for our lives.

I'm no theologian or Bible scholar, but I do know this......

I was created to have a relationship with Christ. To know Him. To love Him. To glorify Him. To lead others to Him.

That's my purpose in life.  

Author Susanna Foth Aughtmon said, "It is not so much about following a career path as it is about following the path of Christ."  

I couldn't agree more.  

That is a difficult thing to admit because we all have hopes and dreams for our careers.  What I wouldn't give to be a stay at home writer/mama.  To be able to plan my day around Bible study, coffee, reading, and writing.  Ahhhh!  

I understand, and accept that this option is not in the cards for me right now.  I choose to be ok with that and will continue to take part in bible study each day and read and write when I can.  And coffee, well, as long as there's Folgers, and Dunkin Donuts and Starbucks......I'll always have coffee. 

But my purpose other than to live for Christ?  

What is that?

I've considered this a lot lately.  

And I've thought this.....

Sure, I love Jesus. I live for Him, but do I really live with PURPOSE?  Do I have a purposes each and every day?  

And no, not really.

I am a fly by the seat of my pants kinda girl.

I don't make plans.

I don't make lists.

I just go with it (usually).

But what if I tried to intentionally live with purpose each day?

What if I made lists and goals?

What if?

Well, why not?  

So, there we have it.

My One Word for 2016.

So for the next 365 days, I will work to live with purpose, not that I want to be chained to To Do Lists, but that I know what I'm doing and why I'm doing it.  That I am being intentional and doing things that are worthwhile and meaningful. And that in all of these things, I am doing them for the Lord, to grow His kingdom.

We need to know that there is purpose in all things.  God has a plan and why shouldn't we?  I need to be reminded that there is a purpose to getting the laundry done. I need to be reminded that there is purpose in the mess of life.  I need to know that my purpose as a teacher isn't always academic.  I want to be able to live with purpose AND see purpose in my daily life.

And letting my five year old write my One Word for me.....yes, there is purpose in that.

A Year of Yes

It's that time of year for us...to look back on 2015 and reflect on how things worked out.

I'm one of those really indecisive people.  I can't even choose what's for dinner.  So, for me to say, "Yes" to something is huge.

Saying "Yes" is very difficult, especially if the outcome will be life changing.  Sometimes that little 3 letter word just takes you out of your comfort zone.  

Here's a look back at some of my YES moments for 2015.

Active Duty

My husband and I talked a lot about the possibility of moving from Reserves to Active Duty.  Before that happened though, he took a leap from Reserves to National Guard.  Then we said YES to sending off the active duty packet.  That's a major commitment....you risk uprooting your family, leaving all that is comfortable for the the unknown.  But we said YES.  

God said NO.

Jeff submitted his packet.  For whatever reason, his packet did not go before the board.

I'll admit, it was a somewhat disappointing.  I felt certain that God had called my husband to be an active duty Army Chaplain.  Maybe he has, but this just wasn't the time.  I don't know.  But we talked and prayed and said YES.  I think sometimes that's all God wants us to do,  just show we trust him.

Teacher of All Things

Really, I didn't have a choice in this.  At my school this year, we were told that we were going to teach ALL subject areas.  Yes, the girl that must have pencil and paper or a calculator to work out her math......I was going to be a math teacher for the first time in about 15 years.  I was not excited, but I knew there was absolutely NOTHING I could do about it.  

Mindset people!

I changed my mindset and said, "YES! I can do this!"

And I did.

Now, I'm not saying I was the perfect math teacher. NO WAY!  But I learned along with my students. I gave them my best effort, and you know.....It wasn't terrible.  Not everyday anyways!  There were days I enjoyed it. There were days my kids had fun and light bulbs went off.  There were notes and blog messages about how fun math class was. There was the parent conference where I heard, "Thank you. She is having such good year in math this year. She is so much more confident."

Because I said YES to changing my mindset about something I was uncomfortable with, I made it through a trying time.  And I encouraged some children along the way.

We Moved!

For a few years now, we have been unhappy with where we lived. Well, maybe not unhappy, just a little frustrated.  We had some amazing neighbors and some not so amazing neighbors. We lived on a dead end street that was busier than Grand Central Station.  So, we house hunted. For years.  In late winter and early spring, we got serious about finding a new home.  The Army had said "no," so it was time to move on, or across town anyway.  

There was a house we had been looking at for a couple of years. Yeah, we actually took a tour of this house several times, even during melting snow to make sure the basement didn't leak.  We wanted this house.....it was huge, in a good neighborhood, and well, huge.  It was a bit expensive and the owner wasn't budging on the price. And it needed updating. Lots of it. We looked at some other houses, said yes to one, but was told it sold 15 minutes after we left. Shucks.

Then we found The One. Although I didn't realize it was The One.  It was in the perfect neighborhood, but wasn't really what I expected. I just wasn't sure about it.  Jeff and I had a trip to Starbucks to discuss our reasons for wanting to move. This house was the answer.  We said YES and are loving our new home.  Great neighbors (I didn't know people actually welcomed you to the neighborhood with cookies).  Wonderful neighborhood. Horse farm in the backyard.  Kids for our boys to play with.  Almost no traffic.

We closed in May. Remodeled in June and July. Moved in days before Colin's 13th birthday (just in time for his party). And it's home.

Family and Fun

What good is life if we aren't enjoying it?  It's so easy to say NO to things because of messes, time, selfishness.....the list can go on.  But I'll tell you this, I have not regretted saying YES to fun this year, whether for me or my family.

We've been busy this year. Some of our favorite activities have been:

Singing in the car

Cuddling on the couch

Reading

Baseball

Soccer (rec league and middle school)

Academic Team

Robotics

Swimming

Sleepovers

Boating

KYA

Winter Xtreme

Birthday parties

Cookouts

Sitting around the fire

And the list could go on.  Regardless of the activity, we spent time together. We spent time apart. We enjoyed doing things that were meant for fun.  

Jesus

Not only have I enjoyed saying YES to fun times with my family, but saying YES to Jesus is always a blessing.  Sunday School, VBS, Camp Creative, Back Yard Bible Club, Pancakes with Santa, Wednesday Night Nursery Duty.  You can never go wrong with saying YES to Jesus.  

I have found this year that the more I said YES to Him, the more my kids did too.  Colin has gotten more involved at church. He is involved in the Youth Group, Praise Band, and Adult Choir.  He also serves as an usher and runs the sound and video system.  Carson and Carter have also enjoyed staying dedicated to their nightly devotions and taking part in their classes and children's choir.  We have a lot of great conversations about faith and Jesus. There's nothing like serving God as a family. 

It is a wonderful feeling to look back and see that we are changed for the better for spending time with and saying YES to God. 

Five Minute Friday Retreat

I'm a big chicken when it comes to meeting new people.  And the thought of attending a weekend with 20 or more people I had never met in person......terrifying.  But with the encouragement of my husband, I signed up for the first ever Five Minute Friday Retreat. God never let me get nervous, and even though it was a crazy time of year, I never opted to back out.  

The retreat was a blessing in so many ways. 

Writing

Food

New Friends

Books

Jewelry

Opportunity

Devotionals

Confidence

So much from a weekend at the lake with perfect strangers......sisters in Christ.....lovers of Jesus and words.   It's possible that I could never see these women in real life again, but they will always hold a special place in my heart.  

These, my friends, are some of my YES moments.  One thing I've learned is that someone else's big is our little (and vice versa).  And I'm ok with that.  My big is just learning to say YES more and see what God has in store for me.

What about you?  What did you say YES to this year.  

Is It Really God's Job to Fix It?

With all the terror going on in the world, our country, our state, our cities, our homes.....We wonder where God is in all this.  The latest headlines read.....

But my question is this

Is it really God's job to fix it?

We treat God like a magic genie.

We stuff him back into the lamp until we want something.  Then, we rub the lamp expecting him to appear and grant our wishes.

I'm not a genius, but I know that's not the way it is supposed to work.

As I am reading my daily advent readings, I am reminded all the more that God created us out of love, His love for us.  And part of that love is to have a relationship with us.  Yes!  God wants us. He wants us to spend time with Him.  He wants to be a part of our lives....in the good and the bad.

But we are fallen and we only want Him in the bad.

It's in the bad that we pray for others.

It's in the bad that we seek Him to fix what's wrong.

It's in the bad we wonder where He is and why He isn't doing anything to make things better.

But after reading headlines and online posts about why God isn't doing anything, I am a reminded that He did do something....


God sent Christ.

And us.

And if we are in Christ and we are choosing to live our lives for Him, then we have the power to fix this to the best of our humanly abilities.

Another headline I read was this, displayed in my kitchen window....

And for me, this is the answer.

We must fear Him.

And we don't.

As a nation, we don't fear God.  And that's not to fear Him as in be scared to death of Him, which maybe we really need to be. But it is fear as in respect and acknowledge Him for who He is and what He can do.

Why should he show mercy to us?

We want to throw Him away.  Stick Him in a corner.  Rid our lives and homes of Him.  We want to pick and choose from the Bible what we should believe (if we choose to believe the Bible).  We want to justify and cry out "free choice" and "don't judge" and "it's my life" and then we wonder where things went wrong.

So why should He fix anything?

As a nation, if we really want to leave in peace, we must fear Him.

As a world, if we want this terror to stop, every heart and soul on this planet must choose to live for Him each and every day.

Until then, this..."this".....this pain and horror and terror won't end until Jesus returns.

But if we want things to get better until then, if we want to live in peace, we have to live for Jesus.  All of us. Not just my family. Not just my city. Not just my state. Not just my country. Not just my continent. But my whole world.

The Past Makes Us Who We Are Today

After publishing my last blog post, my husband read over it and commented on this section:

Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “For everything there is a season, as time for everything under heaven.”  For me, the changing seasons are a reminder of that.  When the leaves start to fall, when the first snowflake floats across the sky, when the flowers start to bloom, and when the heat of the day takes our breath away, well, those moments serve as reminders that life is full of change. There are beginnings and endings and stories and moments in between.  And honestly, I am thankful for that change. I don’t want to stay in November forever and relive that moment my husband boards a plane for Afghanistan. I don’t want to stay in the season of deployment or sickness or family crisis. I need rebirth. I need change. I crave the smell of freshly cut spring grass and the sound of summer thunderstorms.  Changing seasons remind me that there is always hope.

What he told me was this....

"I don't live in those seasons, but they are a part of me.  There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about being in Afghanistan.  I don't dwell on it, but it is a part of who I am."

I had to think about it for a moment, and then I agreed.

I think about the seasons of life that have changed me, that although I don't wish to relive those moments, they are a part of me and have made an impact on my life.

My miscarriage was probably the first thing that came to mind.

There is rarely a day that goes by that I don't think about that season.  In a matter of weeks, my life changed.  From finding out that you are pregnant with baby number 4 to finding out that child has stopped growing to actually losing your baby from your body.....that changed me.  I never knew that I could love someone I've never met face to face that much.  I never knew that baby would still be a part of me.  As I sat looking at the stockings hanging from the mantle last night, I fought back tears, knowing that an almost two year old should have a stocking up there too.

But in all that devastation, I learned something else.  I learned just how much God loves me.

Now, I don't know why I had a miscarriage.  I'm not going to question those specifics.  But I do know that God took care of me.  He provided for me in so many amazing ways.  Through my husband, my doctor, my nurses, and my friends and family, God's love was evident.  The peace He gave me is indescribable.  And now, I'm more aware.....I'm not claiming to be the best mom in the world by any means, but I've learned to focus on my children, to give them my full attention, to cherish each moment with them.  I find myself just watching them, taking them in, deep into my soul.  Their love, their laughter, their innocence.

Jeff's deployment also changed me, impacting who I am today.  Deployment is rough, I'm not gonna lie, but God works through all things.  He provided for our family during deployment.  He kept my husband safe.  He gave me peace during times that I thought there would be none.  He gave me an amazing church family to care for us and pray for us.  I've learned not to take my husband for granted.  He is a gift, an amazing husband, father, and servant.  As I've watched him care for his soldiers, I am moved.  He has a gift, an ability to connect with others and speak truth to them.

And through this thing called deployment, I learned that I'm not alone.  There are women who did this before me, alongside me, and continue so after me.  I've learned all the more that I don't have it all together, and that's just fine.  As long as I have God, He will provide for me in ways I could never imagine.

And as I type these words, I'm seeing a pattern.....Do you?

It's not in those mountaintop moments that I realize how much I need God.  It's in those valleys when it seems hope is gone, when I feel lost, when I feel afraid, when I'm weak....it's those moments that I realize my great need for Him.  And it's then when I feel Him closest to me, when He reveals Himself to me in amazing ways.

Those are the Valleys of Blessings.

And I'm thankful for them.

Without those seasons of life, I would become prideful. I would push God aside and claim my victories as my own.  But Christ is the one who has overcome the world for me. And so I am thankful for those seasons that remind me of my neediness for Christ.  

Five Minute Friday: Weary

So, Kate’s word this week is weary.  I’m from the south. We don’t get weary. We get tired.

And ya’ll…..

I’m tired.

Physically, I need some rest.  Late nights. Early mornings. Going and going all day long. 

Mentally, I need some rest.  I want to veg out, watch Christmas movies, an NCIS marathon (or 90210 or Homeland).  I want my brain to do NOTHING.

As a mama, I’m tired.  I’m tired of fussing and stopping arguments.  I’m tired of backtalking and hateful attitudes.  And while I’m on the subject….Pray for me. I have a teenager.  Oh.

But in all this weariness…

My heart

My soul

My body

I find rest.

I find rest in Christ.

And I don’t know how to put it into elaborate words, so I will say it simply.

When I’m weary, Christ gives me rest.

In Him, I find peace.  I find hope. I find joy.

And we are all going through something that makes us weary, and I tell you, girl….There’s Jesus.  He wants you to bring him all your burdens.  He wants you to lay them down at His cross. He wants to give you strength and rest.

And my five minutes are up, but let me tell you this.

Whether you are a tired mama

A military wife

A warrior battling disease

Whether your finances are in shambles

Your marriage is falling apart

You don’t know where you will lay your head tonight

Take it to Christ.  He wants you to lean on Him.  He wants to give you rest for your weary self. 

I’ve been there.

I’ve been weary from deployment and finances and my career and sick children and miscarriage and - - - - and Christ was there.  When I chose to carry my burdens to Him, he met me right where I was and gave me rest, gave me peace, gave me hope.

And Christ can do that for you too.

Just say Jesus.

Serve

Today was a wonderful day.  A friend from church organized a Backyard Bible Club for a mobile home park near our church.  Those kids and their families showed up.  One guy showed up in a big way.

This guy from the mobile home park is not a member of our church, but he does attend when his work schedule allows. The kids come and seem to love it. We definitely love them.

Although he wasn't part of the group that was there to serve, he served in a big way.

The first thing he did was show up.  How else can you see what God wants you to do if you fail to show up?

He volunteered to take some food back to his home and heat it up for the ladies.  They were afraid it wouldn't be warm enough and in time for lunch. So he carried the crock pot full of chili to and from his house.

He monitored the activities. He chatted with us and his neighbors.  He put himself out there socially, which isn't always easy to do.

When it was time to clean up, he helped. As some of the church guys were loading the garbage up to take back to the church, he wouldn't allow it.  He said to leave it and he would take care of it.  He was assured that we didn't mind taking it back. He assured us he didn't mind carrying it off to their dumpster.


But this guy....he served.  He may not realize it or not, but he served Christ today. And it melted my heart.

We can all do something.

Remember the lady who poured the oil on Jesus and rubbed his feet with oil and her hair?  That was all she had. She served.

Remember the widow who gave the little money she had?  The rich people didn't think it was worth anything, but it was all she had. She served.

We can't all sing.

We can't all do crafts.

We can't all paint faces.

We can't all play an instrument.

We can't all teach or preach or perform.

We can all serve.

We can serve the food.

We can toss a ball to a two year old.

We can monitor activities so kids are safe and have fun.

We can go down the inflatable slide with each kid who asks.

We can take a hotdog and drink to the elderly lady who can't walk to the food line.

We can have a conversation with a stranger.

We can learn someone's name.

We can pick up the trash at the end of the day.

We can show up and see what happens when we say YES to serving Jesus.

                                              
I encourage you to show up and show your children the many ways to show the love of Christ to others.