Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Wife to Wife Wednesdays: Problems and Issues Within Military Marriages

We are a relatively new military family. In fact, we have been married for over 13 years, but have only been in the military for about 4 years.

The time apart has been most difficult for us; however, God has provided for us in so many amazing ways.  His blessings are what have gotten us through rough patches.

Jeff began traveling for his civilian job when Colin was two and a half years old. His first trip - 2 months in Japan.  During this time, Jeff missed Thanksgiving and Colin's Christmas program. Colin also locked himself in the bathroom with the bath running, and our heat went out.  At the end of this time, we had an ice storm,  and Jeff's flight was delayed.

Jeff continued to travel for work after Carson was born. After Carter was born, he attended CH-BOLC for 3 months. During this time, my grandmother passed away. We also had car and electrical trouble.

Jeff has continued to travel for both his chaplaincy position and for his civilian job. During each trip, we have experienced some sort of drama at home.

Looking back, I can see how these times were a blessing.  I can't imagine having to go through a deployment with 3 kids and never having to be by myself before.  It was almost like God was preparing us.

Another thing that has helped us has been technology.  We are blessed to live in the age of email, text messaging, and Skype.  These things have enabled us to keep in touch during times apart.

The main thing that has kept us strong is our faith in God.  Without Him, we couldn't do this thing called military life.

Perhaps one of the things that has touched me the most is this.....

When Jeff was being interviewed by the chaplain board, he was asked about our relationship.  They basically wanted to know if he trusted me, did he think I would ever have an affair if he were to deploy.  He told them that he trusted me and that I was totally dedicated to our family and supportive of what God had planned for him.

That is what my purpose as his wife is: to be totally dedicated to our family, our marriage and to support him in whatever God calls him to do.

Life is hard. Marriage is a lot of work.  God never promises us that either will be easy.  He promises to be there with us.  When I made my marriage vows, I made them for life.

We have a choice in how we behave while our husbands are away. We have a choice in how we behave when life gets tough. 

Whether we are military wives or civilian wives, the most important thing that we can do is allow God to lead us.  He will guide us. He will show us how to put our families first.

What about you?

What is one challenge experienced in military marriages that you have been able to work through or overcome?

Join us this week at Wife to Wife Wednesday over at Wives of Faith.  

1 comment:

  1. Amen and Amen! Skype and IM is wonderful. I am so grateful for technology. Without God's leading I don't know where we would be. I suppose I really do: NOT married:) Thank God for His mercy, grace and leading!


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