My dream is to write....for real....all the time...write.
The first thing I ever wrote was a book for Young Author's. If I recall, I wrote it with my friend, Bonnie. I think we were in 6th grade. Throughout the years, I've written poetry and blog posts, but the goal.....I want to write a book. About what I have no idea.
I get these ideas and then fear sets in.
A young friend of mine wrote a blog post recently at her new blog A Lovely Mayhem (check it out) about the the Writing Process.
It was so true. She is wise beyond her years.
We (or I) begin writing. The momentum is great. The ideas are flowing. The keyboard is on fire!
Then
That first bit of doubt eases in. What began as a beautiful flower has now wilted.
It's dumb. It doesn't make any sense. No one will care.
Ouch. I hate that.
As a writer (can I call myself that?), I want my words to move people. I want my words to change lives. That's a big task. Can I handle it? Do I have what it takes? Can I take raw emotion, real life experiences, and honesty then blend it with the right words and say something worth saying?
I want to. Oh, so badly, I want to.
Some days it feels as if I have nothing to say, no words to share. There are the days when I have the words, but I hold them back. I don't want to offend. I don't want to point fingers. I don't want bring shame. Then there are days when I don't hold back. The words flow from my fingertips and I eagerly click post.
Those days are refreshing.
Those days are far and few right now.
I've got to convince myself that words are worth sharing. I have to let go of the insecurity. I have to believe in myself. I have to just do it.
What are your dreams? What is holding you back? We live in a time of possibilities, and seriously, with My God.....ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!
When I first began this blog, I made a deal with Him. (Come on, I know I am not the only one out there that makes deals with God!) This was a to be a place to bring Him honor and glory. Whether I was going to write a devotional or share about my family or tell about the military, whatever the words that were to come, they were supposed to honor Him. I would not spend time here if I wasn't spending time with Him. I've tried my best to honor that deal.
Some days, I'll admit, it is difficult. I may have a really great idea for a blog post and worry that my readers, dare I say followers, think I've fallen off the face of the earth, but I fail to come here because I haven't held up my part of the deal. If I've not spent time with the Lord and had Him move my soul, I can't come here and share. And for someone who wants to share words, that's difficult.
Whatever our dreams are, whether sharing words, music, athletic talent, those dreams must be aligned with God's will. Sometimes those dreams come with seasons of our lives. God's perfect plan takes us on paths we've never imagined possible. My job is to strengthen my relationship with Him, to grow and allow Him to guide me. If He wants me to write, the words will come. If God wants me doing something else, He will open other doors for me. I do have to realized that He did not place within me a spirit of fear. When I truly feel I have something worth sharing, I need to lean on Him and let His spirit guide my words.
So much truth in this! Thanks for this blessing of a post. I'm thankful that no matter how alone we may feel in our literary struggles, we're all in this together.
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